Waluigi Old

Waluigi what has age done to you?

Dick Dastardly

Waluigi as a racer.


The Bowler Hat Guy in his slightly younger days.

The Bowler Hat Guy is an immature, creepy, and perhaps a potential sex offender whose childhood was ruined because he sucked at baseball and he later grew up to become Waluigi, Wario's brother and Luigi and Mario's rival.


Michael "Goob" Yagoobian was born so ugly that his parents Dick Dastardly and Penelope Pitstop gave him up to the orphanage. Michael was roommates with a geeky genius named Lewis Robinson. Michael was a depressed lad for being abandoned at birth, sadly he was not intelligent enough to start technology like Steve Jobs and find out about his family. Instead he grew old inside of the orphanage, once he turned 27 he left. He ended up meeting a strange floating/evil hat, Michael, having just drunk a six pack of bud lite agreed to follow the hat around. Michael then was able to travel back in time to stop his roommate from making him sleepy leading to him sucking at baseball. Despite how easy it could've been for Michael to defeat Lewis, he oddly enough failed, and to make it worse lost his only friend...a hat. Michael then went back to the real world.

Meeting Luigi

Michael was walking down the street when he and local plumber Luigi bumped into each other. Luigi said sorry and helped Michael and walked away. Michael decided then and there that, that plumber he just was going to be his life long enemy. Michael having a skill in stalking began to stalk Luigi for 2 years. Michael learned so much about Luigi he wanted to be the nega Luigi and renamed himself Waluigi. Waluigi soon one day as he was stalking Luigi he entered a school where Luigi was visiting a friend of his, when Waluigi enetered he accidently went inside of a classroom. The children freaked out at his ugly apperence and Waluigi was soon arrested for and labeled a sex offender because he couldn't explain why he was in the classroom. Waluigi was innocent however but due to his creepy apperence and socially awkward behavior no one believed him and since Mario could have about any job he wants in the Mushroom Kingdom he made himself judge and declared Waluigi guilty within five minutes of the case. When in jail Waluigi met Mario's famous rival, Wario. Waluigi and Wario both ugly, socially awkward, and misunderstood men soon became the best of friends and once they got out of jail they decided to team up to defeat the Mario Brothers and that's where they came into play in the video game series.

Teaming up with Luigi (Geppetto)

Waluigi decided over many failed attempts to become a better man and he soon gave up being a crook to earn an honest living. (Of course after he constantly cheated on racing show, while using the name "Dick Dastardly" with his pet dug Muttley.) Waluigi eventually found a nice job he liked, and he was married to a supermodel and they had a dimwitted son named Lampwick. Waluigi loved his family very much and would do anything to keep them safe, which is why he cut off contact with Wario, which made Wario so upset he couldn't look at Waluigi even, it was so angering to Wario he even changed his accent so he didn't hear his voice that sounded similar to Waluigi. Wario became a British man. Waluigi one day had an argument with his son about washing his hands before he ate so his son, Lampwick ran away from home. Waluigi looked everywhere for his son but couldn't find him. Waluigi checked the arcade, the school, and Toadsworth's Trippin' Strippin' Club. Lampwick was nowhere. Waluigi then, while at a bar drinking in depressing met a fellow bar goer crying and sad. It was a man named Geppetto, who later reaveled himself to be Luigi, the same Luigi Waluigi stalked for one quarter of his life, that Luigi, but under a new name. Now Luigi and Waluigi made up for being enemies and decided to team up to defeat whatever may have their sons so they made a truce and went off to find Pinocchio and Lampwick. Waluigi and Luigi first checked the school. Luigi first had to convince the staff Waluigi wasn't a sex offender then they were allowed in. When they looked around and didn't see their kids a teacher creeped out by them tried to make light conversation and asked how long they were a couple. (Thinking Luigi and Waluigi were a homosexual couple.) Luigi and Waluigi were so angry their mustaches turned bright red and they threatened to burn down the school if anymore was said on the matter. They then decided to turn to the local drug dealers of the town. Honest John and Gideon.


Waluigi at first first attempted to make a peaceful conversation with them, but Luigi, having being tired of being "the nice guy" beat the shit out of Honest John and scared Gideon away. And then he died because of the whale.

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