Navi is the supreme personification of awesomeness, beauty, and perfection. As a totally flawless being, she looks down on all of us and is disgusted. For some sick horrible reason, she only appeared in The Legend of Zelda: Ocarina of Time and never again. Someday, however, Navi will return and The Legend of Zelda's awesomeness level of -43% will soar all the way back to 0%.

Powers And Abilities

Navi can pinpoint one's weaknesses like the big eyeball, the flashing blue tail, and your self-esteem. She can be used as an alarm clock, a pager, and a phone that can only call Saria. Her most useful capability is recording what she sees and sending it directly to her hard drive. She also has a vast knowledge of useless sci-fi trivia. Debatably, she can hear the voices of spirits trapped inside walls, but these are more likely to be drug induced auditory hallucinations.

Film Making Career

Navi's income comes comes from using her recording ability to create adult films and sell them in the Back Alley of Castle Town. Unbeknownst to Link, she would also record his strangely erotic misadventures with Like Likes, ReDeads, and the time he was asleep for seven years with the old man in the room then post them on kiddie porn sites that The Owl regularly visits. The more gruesome moments, such as the battle inside Jabu Jabu's anus, are used to create shock sites.



Not Navi.

Much like the execution of Jesus, Navi's descent from Heaven resulted in scorn, humiliation, and torture from the misguided fools. Fans, reviewers, and other types of underachieving hipsters have corrupted the minds of many (and their own) by falsely accusing Navi of being annoying. This formed a bandwagon for all to jump on like mindless sheep. Since some Zelda fans have more than two brain cells, they have seen Navi for the wonder she is, they are persecuted just as much as she is, but fortunately, they will be spared from her wrath.