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King Harkinian

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"I wonder what's for DINNER?"
– King Harkinian's most famous phrase


20100906202411!KingWondering

Harkinian in deep thought

King Harkinian
Background Information
Gender Male
Age 59
Status
Likes Dinner
Dislikes Being called out on his misbehavior
Nationality
Alignment Varies: mostly Evil
Species Elf (Hyrulian)
Source Legend of Zelda
Sexual Orientation Bisexual
Religion
Realtionships
Family Zelda (daughter)
Friends Morshu
Enemies Ganon, I. M. Meen (only to his good form), Duke Onkled, Gwonam (only to his evil form)

King Harkinian, or The King for short, is one of the main characters/protagonists of Youtube-Poop. He appeared in the 2 Legend of Zelda games for the CD-I as a minor character and only ever those 2 games. Whether he is good or bad varies, but his love for dinner is unquestionable as shown in Poops and the games. He has been made so famous through poop that all you have to do nowadays is type "Harkinian" into YouTube to bring up poops[1].

Personality

The Bad...

In most YTP's, The King is usually portrayed as greedy, immature and selfish,[1] often being a jerkass in one way or another to most people he meets, especially Duke Onkled and Gwonam. He is also negligent towards his daughter Zelda and even refuses to give her a raise.

Although he seems to be quite affectionate towards Link, and treats him as if he were his own son and a prince, he certainly won't hesitate to abuse him either if Link goes against the King's wishes.

At times, the King can be outright depraved, having a massive gay orgy with several characters[2] and committing incest with his daughter[3].

It is no surprise that the King is in the category titled: "Retarded, Insane, Stupid, Dumb".

...and The Good

Despite King Harkinian's malice and apathy, there is a good side to him after all. After he left Zelda in the castle for a HOLE MUNF, he bravely and passionately saved Zelda from getting molested by Duke Onkled. D'awww!

Powers and Abilities

For defense, he has his Dinner Blaster. First seen in CraaazyCat13's video of the same name, his Dinner Blaster was the later seen in Hotel Mario: Gears of Toasters and The King. He is clearly capable of becoming Super Saiyan and using a Kamehameha. He is also an exceptional pilot, capable of flying any aircraft or starfighter he encounters with surprising skill and dexterity. He has been seen in various poops using other kinds of weapons.

As well as these, he also possesses decent physical strength, showcased whenever he hits or punches someone and they cry out in pain.

Health Issues

Eyesight

The-King-driving-his-Desoto

The King in his car.

When Link was playing with his new laser pointer one day, The King's right eye went permanently blind when the laser was directed to his face. He is no longer allowed to drive because of this.

Alcohol

The King enjoys drinking wine from his favorite glass and frequently visiting Ganon's Pub. Any drinks that aren't spilled on the floor end up causing most of the daily hijinks in the castle. This leads to making insane decisions, attacking Link, and speaking gibberish. The King may also contract other health issues in the long term such as liver and heart disease.

Criminal Record

Shotgun King

An authentic photograph of the shootout at Ganon's Pub.

  • On January 17, 2009, The King was arrested by Mayor Kravindish after a high-speed chase that ended with The King wrecking his new car. He was put on probation for one month and fined 9,100 rupees for driving under the influence of alcohol and attempting to evade arrest.
  • On March 28, 2009, The King was questioned after witnesses reported his involvement in a shootout that occurred the previous night at Ganon's Pub. He admitted to injuring Fat Mario and Gay Luigi with his shotgun after the former urinated in his drink, and then in his face. He was once again put on probation.
  • On July 17, 2009, The King returned to his castle from a vacation to find the place trashed and Link hosting a wild party. He took out his rifle, intending to shoot Link, but Mayor Kravindish, who was attending the party, arrested him on the spot. He was convicted of attempted murder soon after and sentenced to ten years at Hyrule State Prison, but escaped less than a month later when Morshu and Scatman John destroyed one of the prison's walls with a bomb.
  • On July 28, 2009, The king was arrested for smoking Weegee Weed and causing everyone in the kingdom of Hyrule to turn into a Weegee. His arrest took some time because of the shortage of Belgian Waffles.
  • On September 5, 2009, The King was confronted by Mayor Kravindish, who attempted to arrest him again, this time for illegally downloading Sony Vegas. The King escaped in an airship, beginning an aerial chase that ended with Kravindish crashing his helicopter.
  • On September 23, 2012, The King was revealed to be secretly working for Viacom Inc.. This was shown in Spingebill the Horny Drug Addict Gets Sued by Viacom.

Gallery

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Quotes

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Videos

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See Also

To read about the cartoon and the 2 comic stories he was in, both of which don't see any attention in Youtube Poop, click here.

References

  1. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=v5NRY3pS8es
  2. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tZL6YHLwn9M
  3. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jmIAM-hnEjQ

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