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Eggman

You may be asking, who is this "Dr. Eggman" that became Sonic's latest archnemesis? And whatever happened to that dope, Dr. Ivo Robotnik? The answer will blow your mind: you're actually looking at Dr. Robotnik. But it's not the same Robotnik; this one is from the 22nd Century!

Backstory Edit

As the years passed on, Robotnik became a worse inventor as he tried to capture Sonic the Hedgehog, and the rate of his failures increased greatly. Then one day when he ate at a Chinese restaurant, Robotnik's fortune cookie told him to stop obsessing over old hobbies, which in this case was catching Sonic. Even though his IQ is over 300, Robotnik actually believed it and decided to do something else...DESTROY Sonic!!!! Robotnik planned to do this by taking over a McDonald's joint and turning it into a fight club (which is illegal, you know). He then held Ronald McDonald hostage and forced Sonic to fight to save McDonald. Needless to say, Robotnik lost the fight, but things wouldn't have been so bad if he hadn't put ALL THE MONEY HE HAD into the betting booth! So Robotnik spent the next 40 years out on the streets with nowhere to live and nothing to eat but the scrambled eggs he kept in his pocket, which may have been why he changed his name to Eggman. He had plenty of time to exercise, so he decided to finally do something about his enormous gut. But his mustache became shorter and less shiny with age, and his eyesight became so bad he had to wear two pairs of glasses (one of which he does not wear at all because it makes him look like a nerd). Eventually, Eggman got sick of being a hobo and decided to get a job. Unfortunately, the only job that was available to him was at a crummy pizzeria where he spent five nights being molested by an animatronic bear who kept trying to stuff Eggman into a costume. When the boss asked Eggman to work on the weekends without extra pay, he decided to quit. Then one day Eggman tripped on a banana peel and landed on his head. When he woke up, he suddenly felt like he could invent again! Somehow, being hit on the head had made Eggman less iconic so he got his inventing skills back. So, he built an army of badniks to build an island fortress. Unfortunately, this still did not solve Eggman's money issue. As Eggman thought about this, he realized that he never would have been broke if it wasn't for that stupid hedgehog! So, Eggman invented time travel and teleported his fortress back to the 21st Century, robbed his past self, and continued to do his rottenness in the present.

Current History Edit

Eggman now lives in the 21st Century in a fortress that's literally 200 feet from Sonic's house so he can molest the hyperactive hedgehog at any time! He calls it his "island fortress" but it's connected to the beach where Sonic lives by a rocky path, so the fortress isn't on an island. He scrapped Future Scratch and Future Grounder and created two much more advanced mechanical minions--Orbot and Cubot. Sadly, Eggman used Future Scratch and Future Grounder's parts to make them, which is why they're just as incomptent. Eggman is actually not much more of a threat than Robotnik. I mean, sure, most of his badniks are armed with bombs or lasers or buzzsaws, but the deadliest ones are also the stupidest (like Obliterator-Bot, who misinterpreted Eggman's commands and destroyed Eggman's fortress instead of Sonic's four friends). And when they're not totally destructive, they're just pathetic (like Ballot-Bot, whose only power is to rig elections so Eggman can win). Nevertheless, Eggman is just as liable to do some rottenness as Robotnik, and has kidnapped Sonic and/or his friends on many occasions. One time he even tried to destroy the world to prove that squirrels are stupid

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